50529

Joke of the Day

"How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? THAT'S NOT FUNNY!"

"I wish this cop would stop riding my ass, it makes me paranoid. I also wish he'd turn his sirens off and stop trying to shoot out my tires."

"Summer body wasn't ready.. But winter body is good to go!"

"Fruit By The Foot, but no Meat By The Meter? I call bullshit."

"Why was Putin late for dinner with Obama? Because he got Snowden."

"What's worse than ants in your pants? Uncles."

"Did you hear about the redneck woman's husband who killed her father and her brother? Supposedly she didn't even know he was suicidal"

"The other day, my friend told me I didn't know what ""irony"" meant... Which was ironic, because I didn't."

"I seemed to have lost all my vegetable puns I hope they turnip somewhere"

"When's the best time to go to the dentist? Tooth hurty (2:30)"