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Joke of the Day

"How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? THAT'S NOT FUNNY!"

"Why did the baker's hands smell Because he kneaded a poo."

"What did the tectonic plate say when it had a collision? It's not my fault."

"How do you split $6 between 5 mexicans? You cut *Juan* out."

"I forgot my coffee this morning so I'm gonna drive on the rumble strips along the side of the road all the way to work just to be safe."

"Wife is painting the upstairs bedrooms. It's not in my nature to sit still while she slaves away so I went up and complained about the color"

"What kind of music do cows listen to? (dadjoke) MOOOOOsic."

"Tory Spelling walks into a bar The barman asks, ""Why the long face?"""

"If you pee on a cop Urine trouble. (Credit to my bff)"

"Today I swallowed two pieces of string... Later they came out tied together, I shit you knot."