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Joke of the Day

"Why was the desperate teen spinning in circles around the hot chick? Because he really wanted that beyblade."

"You hear about the agnostic, dyslexic insomniac? He stays up all night, every night, wondering if there truly is a dog."

"I bought a pair of shoes from my drug dealer I don't know what he laced them with but I've been tripping all day"

"Why dont witches wear panties? So they can grip the broom."

"Did you hear the one about the guy who got two tickets to the Cuckold Convention? His wife ended up taking someone else."

"My roommate told me my clothes look gay. I told him to have some respect. They just came out of the closet."

"How many unemployed actors does it take to change a light bulb? 100. One to change it and 99 to stand around and say, ""Hey, I could've done that!"""

"What do gay horses eat? *HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYY*"

"A man walks into a bar.... ...sits down, orders a beer, and begins to gaze longingly at the barmaid. The barmaid hands him the beer, returns the stare and says... ""Take a pitcher, it'll last longer."""

"When I see you, I'm a 10... On the [Mohs scale](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mohs_scale_of_mineral_hardness#Minerals)."