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Joke of the Day

"A guy is fucking his wife up the ass when the house catches fire. Why does his wife make it outside first? Her shit is packed."

"Just made a voodoo doll of myself that I'm about to beat some sense into."

"As he inserted the rectal thermometer, I got a painfully hard and obvious erection. ""Maybe you should wait outside while I examine your dog,"" said the vet."

"What did the left ass cheek say to the right ass cheek? Whose the asshole in the middle."

"What do you tell a Hockey player messing up with you... ... Stop pucking around"

"Duct Tape Turning ""No no no"" into ""mmm mmm mmm"""

"Q: Did you hear they put two new faces on Mt. Rushmore? A: Yeah they were Bill Clinton."

"A teen girl is talking to her mother about the birds and the bees. She asks her mother if it's possible to get pregnant from anal sex. The mother says, ""Why yes, that's how lawyers are born!"""

"There are 10 types of people in this world... Those who understand binary, those who don't, and those who didn't expect this joke to be in base 3."

"I asked ny blind friend to read braille for me I guess every lego spells out ""fuck you dude""."