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Joke of the Day

"A time traveller walks into a bar... http://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/3lsgus/and_the_bartender_says_sorry_we_dont_serve_time/"

"What do Jimmy Saville's victims and Aston Villa fans have in common? They're still talking about what happened in 1982."

"People ask me the secret of a good tweet. It's called ""proof-reading"". Perhaps you've hard of it"

"21 afraid of 20 We all know why 6 was afraid of 7, but why was 21 terrified of 20? Because twenty-eight twenty-nine... (With profuse apologies.)"

"Why did the Mexican man push his wife off a cliff? tequila"

"what did Obama say to Trump? show me your schlong form birth certificate"

"""Dude, what's with the outfit?"" ""Bruh, I got a job as a bouncer"" *hops away in kangaroo costume*"

"What's the hardest part about rollerblading? Telling your parents you're gay"

"Brain: Compliment her eyes Me: Yeah? Brain: Trust me ""YOUR EYES ARE BLUE LIKE BLUEBERRIES & THEY'RE PROBABLY SQUISHY TOO."" Brain: Perfect!"

"Sure I'll join your Cause on Facebook...Right after I jump out of an airplane without a parachute..."