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Joke of the Day

"Whenever I go to McDonalds, they always ask me ""What can I get you?"" and I always say ""Give me a second."" And they always give me the number two."

"I'm here to tell you the truth about Trump voters! [deluded]"

"Did you hear that Elon Musk announced plans for a restaurant on the moon? He said we can count on good food but no atmosphere."

"What's brown and screams? Stevie Wonder answering the iron"

"How does a cow quickly do math? With a cow-culator! (Rimshot)"

"Why were the two homosexual melons protesting at city hall? Because they cantaloupe"

"[M]y boyfriend asked me i[f] I could do him in the butt. I never pegged him for that type of guy."

"Why are gym memberships illegal? Because of the Free Exercise Clause."

"How does Austin Powers decide which guys he will sleep with? (NSFW) By giving them an oral test first. ""If you can gag me, you can shag me!"""

"Today is apparently Ash Wednesday which I can only assume has something to do with our hero from the hit TV show Pokemon."