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Joke of the Day

"Where is the best place to have anal sex? A cemetary, freaks a woman out a little bit, makes it that much tighter..."

"Can a kangaroo jump higher than a house? Of course, a house doesn't jump at all."

"20 yr old mom: my child is my life I would give my own life for him 40 yr old mom: GET OFF THE INTERNET RIGHT NOW OR I WILL END YOU"

"Due to its location South Africa doesn't experience full tide or low tide... it has apartheid."

"What's the difference between a hedgehog and a Jeep? With the hedgehog the pricks can be seen on the outside and with a Jeep the prick can be seen on the inside."

"[JOB INTERVIEW] {Don't let them know you're a tectonic plate} ""What would you say is your biggest fault?"" San Andreas?"

"Food Fact: PringlesTM are actually shavings from the AllpringleTM, which resides in the center of the Earth"

"I wasn't able to apply for a job in the Endoscopy unit... ... it was internal application only."

"Started my new job yesterday, and have to go back in today already. THIS IS BULLSHIT."

"Batman took some flak going to the Police Ball dressed as the Joker But sometimes he's his own worst enemy."