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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the nurse who swallowed razor blade? She gave herself a tonsillectomy, an appendectomy, a hysterectomy, and circumcised three of the doctors on her shift."

"How do you get a baby into a shoebox? A. With a blender. Q. How do you get a baby out of a shoebox? A. With a straw."

"I brought a dyslexic girl home last night. She cooked my sock."

"Why did god kill all the herbivore dinosaurs? He liked his salads a little meteor."

"What's brown, dirty, and sticky? A stick"

"Trump obviously has the support of the Freemasons He wants to build a wall, and do you know who gets paid to build walls? **MASONS!**"

"Why Did 9Gag Cross The Road? To steal a Reddit User's post on the other side."

"Ferguson Protestors looted a Payless Shoe store last night... Cleaned the place out, nothing left but work boots..."

"""Do you want to play doctors and nurses?"" *flirty giggle* ""ok..."" ""I'm a specialist. The earliest I can see you is May next year"""

"I want a matronly African American to say, ""Child, please"" when I'm being silly."