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Joke of the Day

"What do you get when you cross Hilter, the Terminator, and Cthulhu? Don't stick around to find out!"

"Doctor: ok, just need a urine sample & we're done. Me handing him my boxers: I'm in a rush. Just wring these out."

"I got fired from my job as a bingo caller... apparently ""A meal for two with a terrible view"" was a pathetic way to announce the number 69."

"What artistic dog chews a lot and follows the rules of the farm where it lives? A Chihuahua that can draw and gnaw while obeying the law and lying on straw!"

"What do you call a fat computer? A Dell."

"What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable ? The wheelchair"

"What's worse than being a tanning salon owner in Africa? Being a Somali Uber driver in Columbus, Ohio."

"(Male-related)When I have a double stream, is there something obstructing the penis? or is it just being a dick?"

"I'd tell you a good chemistry joke but all the good ones argon."

"How do you catch a fish with peas? Drop some peas along the shore, and when a fish comes up to take a pea, you grab him."