49467

Joke of the Day

"Jesus one said: ""he who lives by the sword will die by the sword"" Apparently Jesus loved crossfit"

"[ cookout ] Me: OMG this ketchup is amazing! Host: yea yea we all know you brought the ketchup"

"So my friend told me that he has been constipated for the past three weeks... I'm pretty sure he's full of shit."

"What do you call a cross between a bulldog and shitzu? Its called ""Whatever comes out of Donald Trump's mouth""."

"What's the definition of ""trust""? Two cannibals doing 69."

"Spank me once, shame on you. Spank me twice, that's more like it."

"""Is this InkJet any good?"" ""Sure we've sold it to royalty"" ""Princesses?"" ""Mate, it prints ALL the letters"""

"What does a Mexican say to piss you off? ""You are now Manuelly breathing."""

"I got kicked out of a store trying to buy condoms All I wanted was to use their fitting room!"

"What is the opposite of Dominoes? Domi does not know...."