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Joke of the Day

"If my mom had just faked having a headache I wouldn't be writing this bullshit on the internet right now"

"What does a cannibal do after dumping his girlfriend? Wipes his butt."

"That's a great river Dam it!"

"Feels like there's not enough blood in my drugstream."

"How do Southerners get through customs so quickly? They do declare!"

"Anal with my girlfriend made my whole day But it made her whole week."

"I thought I was wrong once But I was mistaken"

"Three nuns are walking down the street, when a streaker runs past them. The first one has a stroke The second one has a stroke And the third doesn't touch him."

"What do you get when you cross human DNA and goat DNA? Kicked out of the petting zoo."

"I don't know what hurts my wrist more, playing volleyball or watching women's volleyball!"