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Joke of the Day

"Happiness is a relative thing. I finally have some extra money and suddenly my relatives are happy."

"Not to brag, but they know me by name at the liquor store and the police station."

"*Passing the same coworker in the hallway more than once: Don't look at me, I already said ""Hi"" to you."

"Guy in orchestra was charged with manslaughter Police state that he had a history of reckless violins."

"Your mama's so fat... She broke the branch off the family tree"

"What do blacks and bicycles have in common? They both require chains to work. (no offense to black people intended)"

"I'd love to tell you a science joke... ...but all the good ones argon."

"The time you really begin to envy your cat Monday morning."

"I bought a toaster with variable browning control but all it will say is ""Take away love and our earth is a tomb""."

"What did the prostitute say to the psychic? I don't do aural. You're welcome and I'll show myself out."