4855
Joke of the Day
"Knock knock? Who's there? Come in. Come in who? Me."
Next Joke
"mL m^3 gallons quart barrel This post speaks volumes."
"What did the egg say to the boiling water? It's gonna take me a little while to get hard, I just got laid by this chick."
"Dad keeps breaking into my phone, so I found a password he won't remember. My birthday."
"Me: I can't get this star on top of the Christmas tree without a ladder, without dumping it over & ruining it. Whiskey: Yes you can."
"What did the Shit Summoner say at the bar ? Mind if I pull up a stool ?"
"Sometimes I keep Facebook open in two tabs to remind myself I'm worthless."
"I was getting a blowjob and I told the girl to treat my dick like a jolly rancher.... and keep on sucking."
"A doctor to his patient. Doctor: Sir, we have some good news and some bad news, the good news is that you've got a day left to live, the bad news is I forgot to tell you that yesterday."
"How you doin' Jerusalem! ""WINE"" Here's a new tric- ""MAKE WINE"" Please, I've been working very hard on my routi- *dodges stone jars of water*"