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Joke of the Day

"Why are housing prices in Toronto falling? Because the market got flooded."

"I'm writing a song about getting my front door lock replaced. There's a lovely key change at the end."

"FOX HOLE Q: What's it called when a soldier slips into a fox hole? A: Bestiality."

"Two Muffins are sitting in an oven... The first muffin says ""Man, it is hot in here!"" then the second muffin says ""HOLY SHIT A TALKING MUFFIN!"""

"Two Jehovah Witnesses walk into a bar. LOL JK. They knocked."

"I'd like to see things from your point of view, but I can't seem to get my head that far up your ass."

"You shouldn't legally be allowed to buy Cool Ranch Doritos unless you pay for it with change while stoned at a gas station"

"Who thought blowing out candles on a cake was a good tradition? Ah yes; wax would go well with this cake and you know what else? Child spit."

"Did you hear they are trucking tons of coal to Mt. Rushmore? There going to add Obama."

"The Past, Present, and Future walked into a bar. ...it was tense."