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Joke of the Day

"a jew, a christian, and a muslim walk into a bar in the holyland hey it could happen, just not on a friday, saturday or sunday"

"What can you say about a car and not a girl/your gf? It's easy to turn on, and even though it's eleven, I still love her."

"What did the Pacific Ocean say to the Atlantic Ocean? Nothing, they just waved."

"Why isn't John Oliver having sultanas in his fruitcake? Because it's the currant year."

"I love Mondays... It's when I take my weekly sarcasm class."

"I really like non-sequiters But I prefer irony."

"How to keep the flies off the bride at an Italian wedding Keep a bucket of shit next to her"

"Somebody spotted a coyote in my neighborhood a few days ago. But it's cool, cause I just started carrying an anvil around everywhere I go."

"Where did I get my scarf? It's a CVS receipt. You love it? Oh thank you very much."

"The list of Republican Presidential Candidates."