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Joke of the Day
"My imagination ran away with me, but we're both out of shape and didn't get very far."
Next Joke
"I hurt my shoulder and doctor told me i shouldn't lift anything heavy. So i'm forced to sit down when i pee."
"I love it when I see an old friend I haven't seen in years and pretend to not see them"
"What do you call an Ethiopian woman with a yeast infection? A quarter-pounder with cheese"
"How do you make a cat go ""woof""? Douse it with petrol and toss a lit match. WOOF!"
"TIL 78% of statistics are made up on the spot"
"I've opened a restaurant called 'Karma'... There's no menu, you just get what you deserve."
"Give me five hundred good reasons you think I'm too demanding."
"Paedophiles are a myth paedophiles are a myth and ya nan is a terrorist."
"*at adoption center* ""Okay yeah they're all great and all, but which one is the most photogenic for Facebook and stuff like that"""