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Joke of the Day

"Halfway through V for Vendetta... ...still waiting for Natalie Portman to evolve into Vaporeon."

"Two hipsters walk into a bar. The first did it before it was cool. The second did it ironically."

"Went to the zoo and all they had was one dog. It was a Shih Tzu."

"What did they call taxi drivers in Nazi Germany? Ubermensch."

"Dracula had impeccable hair for a guy who couldn't see himself in a mirror."

"I just mixed peanut butter and Nutella together in case anyone's curious why I've suddenly started attending church."

"Once I went to a zoo with only one animal. It was a shih tzu."

"My brother & I've competed for title of family black sheep for yrs. He checked in at a strip-club...on FB. Well played brother, well played"

"Q: Why are manhole covers round? A: Because if they were square, you couldn't play twiddlywinks with them."

"You can try to annoy me with bird puns but toucan play that game."