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Joke of the Day

"Why doesn't Ed have a girlfriend? Cause Sheeran."

"What do you call a Mexican baptism? Bean dip!"

"I don't always say bye... but when I do, it's to Felicia"

"I'm going back to work tomorrow after the holiday break, which means playing that annual game: What food is rotting in the office kitchen?"

"AMD should make a self-driving car... ...because they specialize in creating things that don't come with drivers."

"How many frat boys does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Four. One to change the bulb, three to stand around so he has someone to hi-five after."

"[TRYING TO IMPRESS NEW GIRLFRIEND] 'Oh yeah, I love to cook!' *removes salad from the microwave"

"Where do terrorists like to go for a drink? The Allahu Ak Bar"

"Her eyes said no....... But my roofies said yes."

"What country has many sugar? sweetzerland"