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Joke of the Day

"Rick Astly will let you borrow any movie from his Pixar collection except for one... He's never gonna give you ""UP""."

"I quit my job and handed in my badge and gun to my boss, he said, why do you have a gun? You work at McDonald's."

"Did you hear about the haunted burlesque theater? Things went bump and grind in the night."

"What do Greeks call someone when the most common consonant in their name is R? A rho-man"

"Where do you drown a hipster? The Mainstream."

"Sometimes when I'm drunk, I put on a trench coat, lurk around the shadows and pretend I'm the host from Unsolved Mysteries"

"When I'm stressed, I go to the gym Cause then I could workout my problems"

"Never agree to plastic surgery if the doctor's office is full of portraits by Picasso."

"How do you know if a chef is also a mathematician.. ...the proof is in the pudding..."

"We have to operate now if the cancer spreads anymore you won't be able to tell the difference between people & food ""Are you nuts?"" Dear God"