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Joke of the Day

"My friend died today... He wasn't able to speak, but in his dying moments he wanted me to have his EpiPen. I'll cherish it forever."

Next Joke
 
"When something falls in your mouth by accident and you eat it, it's a snaccident."
"What is Paula Deens Least Favorite Pokemon? Butterfree"
"Me: Would you consider going out with a guy a little older than yourself? Her: Well of course I would. Why, do you have a son?"
"Me: Sorry, my son spilled the water Waiter: No problem, I'll get you a new one Me: [grabbing his arm] Make sure this one likes sports"
"I swallowed two cans of helium today HeHe"
"I constantly google ""how to put your kids up for adoption"" so my kids can find it on my search history and know that I'm not messing around."
"Someone Stole my Microsoft Office and they're gonna pay. You have my Word"
"HOT LOCAL MOMS IN YOUR AREA ARE WAITING TO TUCK U IN & WILL BE CHECKING THAT TOOTHBRUSH SO GET IN THERE & DO IT RIGHT MISTER"
"Chuck Norris doesn't have hairy balls because hair does not grow on steel."
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