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Joke of the Day

"How to get out of buying your kids Christmas presents Explain to them that due to Global Warming that the North Pole melted and that Santa and the Reindeer drowned."

"[phone rings] Guy: is your refrigerator running? Me: yes my refrigerator is runn- Fridge [grabs phone]: hello? Yeah actually I do crossfit"

"Why did King Kong go to the airport? He had a plane to catch."

"""I can't wait to move back to Mexico."" -No Juan, ever"

"Based on how I startle when toast pops up, I will never look cool walking away from an explosion."

"How can you tell that you're getting old? You go to an antique auction and three people bid on you!"

"A dyslexic man walks into a bra. ....."

"Why did the octopus blush? He'd just seen the bottom of the ocean!!!!"

"A robot goes to see a psychiatrist... ""Just because my intelligence is artificial doesn't mean that my problems aren't real."""

"""It's so funny running into you like this."" -Guy who just crashed his car into yours in a hilarious way"