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Joke of the Day

"""My desires are... unconventional."" ""Show me."" *opens door to a room full of memes*"

"Me:OMG RYAN GOSLING DIED! Oh. His hair. He dyed his hair. Brown. Can U believe that was a story? Husband: I think it worked great. Me:Zip it"

"Best joke in class So my teacher says: ""all men are the same"" and a classmate says to her: ""oh, so youve tried all of them so you know?"""

"The best thing about sharing a king sized bed with your spouse is that if you move far enough away it feels like you're completely alone."

"Where do snowmen go to dance ? Snowballs !"

"What do you call a snail on a ship? A snailor (My nephew is watching Spongebob please send help my brain cells are leaving one by one)"

"I redid my fence yesterday. It needed to be reposted."

"There was a sign out at the whore house today... It read ""Temporarily closed for lunch; Beat it"""

"Why couldn't the cat walk through the door? it had a javelin through it's head."

"*approaches woman in club* Me: Would you like to dance? Her: Sure. Me: While you're dancing can I sit in your chair? I'm really tired."