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Joke of the Day

"Why did the man get fired from the orange juice factory? Because he couldn't concentrate."

"Why do Physics and Biology teachers never get along? Because they have no chemistry"

"Sometimes waking up means the best part of your day is over."

"FRIEND: hey while I'm on vacation can you come over and feed the cat? ME: FRIEND: ME: to what?"

"When two gay men get married, whose parents pay for the wedding? Neither, because they're both ashamed of their children's disgusting and sinful lifestyle choices."

"I don't care if you're black, white, straight, bisexual, gay, lesbian, short, tall, fat, skinny, rich or poor... I still hate you."

"I keep wanting to make a BDSM joke... ... but I keep getting tied up in the punchline."

"What does a belt like to do? Getting Waisted"

"If I had to lose any bodypart I'd lose my spine. It's really holding me back."

"My friend said he's moving Saturday... I would have offered to help, but where would we move it to- Sunday?"