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Joke of the Day

"With my luck, I bet if I was homeless, I'd probably end up with the shopping cart with the fucked up wheel."

"When they buried the man who invented Tetris the whole cemetry disappeared."

"Why are shoes always tied in the ghetto? Because if not, you always be trippin nigga."

"3 mods walk into a bar. [removed]"

"Butter should re-name itself, ""I Can't Believe It's Not Polysorbate 60, Soy Lecithin, Xanthan Gum and Other Artificial Flavors"""

"Follow your dream, then Unfollow it if it doesn't Follow you back within 48 hours."

"If you gave me a blowjob while in the shower, I'd probably shampoo and condition your hair while you do it."

"The white girls were nestled all snug in their beds, while visions of Ugg boots danced in their heads."

"Want to send a 4-year-old boy into a blind rage? Repeatedly tell him he's wrong and you are positive their names are ""Batman and Robert""."

"Why did Princess Diana cross the road? She didn't wear a seatbelt."