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Joke of the Day

"9 out of 10 child psychologists believe TV's shouldn't be babysitters 9 out of 10 child psychologists don't have children"

"My grandfather's final words before he kicked the bucket were... ""I'm gonna kick this bucket!"""

"After the Heimlich maneuver what's the best way to stop someone from choking? To pull it out."

"If I see someone is too drunk I take their keys. Not for safety, they're probably blacked out and just won't remember I stole their car."

"There's a sign in this bathroom that asks us not to flush anything but toilet paper down the toilet & now I'm unsure how to proceed."

"Remember how they used to call Bill Cosby ""America's Dad""? No fucking wonder most of the country has daddy issues."

"After 30 years of shopping, my wife still has nothing to wear today."

"Why was Stalin literally worse than Hitler? Because Hitler at least wrote his own books"

"What happened to the dwarf who walked between a lady's legs? He got a clit around the ear and a flap on the face."

"Threw a surprise bukakee party for my girlfriend last night You should have seen her face."