159619

Joke of the Day

"My grandfather's final words before he kicked the bucket were... ""I'm gonna kick this bucket!"""

"Why didn't the lazy guy have sex? Because his dick was just too hard"

"Q. What do they call pastors in Germany? A. German Shepherds."

"What has 9 arms and sucks? Def Leopard!"

"Relationship status: fell out of bed while reaching for a donut"

"Buy Domino's Fire everyone Hire dragons Fire roasted pizzas Delivery in six minutes or less IMAGINE DRAGONS"

"I used to do drugs... i still do, but i also used to."

"If attacked by a pack of clowns.... Go for the juggler."

"What do auditioning for an acting role and playing sports have in common? If you break a leg, you get cast"

"My girlfriend recently said that she needs some time and distance... Is she trying to calculate velocity?"