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Joke of the Day

"Sometimes I stand in front of a Redbox until a long line gathers behind me.. Then I'll yell. Where's the fucking Pepsi button on this thing?"

"What does pizza and vagina have in common? They both good hot or cold"

"On a scale from 1-10, how much do I love symmetry? 5"

"When someone says, ""I haven't seen you in forever,"" a fun response is, ""I know, we're really not that good of friends"""

"Three german soldiers... ... Walk into a BAR."

"Pinocchio was going down on his GF, she started yelling lie to me, lie to me. Pinocchio:"" i love you""!"

"What is a monster's favourite society? The Consumers' Association."

"So I was in math class when the teacher asked me what comes after 69. I said 70. I know you were expecting a joke, but I want to pass my exams."

"How do you fix a deaf car? With an engin*eer.*"

"What do you call someone who likes to rap about salt? NaCl-more."