45759
Joke of the Day
"Have you ever heard of Ethiopian food? Neither have they."
Next Joke
"How did I win a Super Smash Bros. Brawl Tournament? I met a knight"
"My dog is so passive-aggressive. She let me sleep in late this morning, but then counter-surfed and stole my breakfast."
"A Native American scolded me for celebrating Thanksgiving, a celebration of slaughter So I said, ""you're right, it's awful what they've done to the turkeys all these years."""
"Me: So, what are your thoughts? Therapist: Well, I think you may have some boundary issues. Me: [In his lap] Are you saying I'm fat?!"
"A general calls a colonel: - Do you have a couple of smart majors? - Yes I do. - Send them to me. I need to move my furniture around."
"How many hipsters does it take to screw in a light bulb? It's an obscure number, you have probably never heard of it."
"Told my dad I had sex with a girl who had HIV. He asked if I was positive."
"When the zombie apocalypse comes, we'll be the last to go because we never leave our houses."
"A man told little Johnny ""I'll give you a piece of candy if you come in my van?"" Little Johnny replied ""I'll cum on your face for the entire bag!"""