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Joke of the Day

"Why do female skydivers use tampons? So they don't whistle on the way down! (Ba-dum tish)"

"5 bucks will get you 1 minue access to the ""Peck cam"" where you can watch all sorts of wild birds peck me while i force myself not to resist"

"Why was the skeleton using the Internet? To bone up on his schoolwork."

"How can you tell Sofia Vergara's children on the playground? They're the ones with stretch marks on their lips."

"What do you call a skeleton who just had anesthesia? A numbskull"

"What is the difference between a dead baby and a water melon? One's fun to hit with a sledge hammer, the other one's a water melon."

"What does robbing a Scotsman get you? Kilt"

"A magician is driving down the street... ...and turns into a driveway."

"Job interview with the NSA Applicant: Would you like references? NSA: We have everything we need. App: You guys! NSA: I know, right!"

"How do police know that princess Diana had dandruff? They found her head and shoulders under the steering wheel."