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Joke of the Day

"Nobody was healthier than my vegan, gluten-free friend Chad until the day that baby squirrel beat him to death."

"My son asked me on father's day why there was no son day I told him it's every sunday"

"A bodybuilder was killed when a fire broke out in my gym. Staff tried to escort him out, but he wanted to feel the burn."

"I like twitter because having one-sided conversations with virtually no feedback reminds me a lot of being a parent."

"My Korean friend died yesterday So Yung..."

"I have trouble ending small talk. Some guy I started talking to in 1998 on a bus is still talking to me. His name is Gary. He hates rain."

"What did the turkey say to the turkey hunter? ""Quack, quack, quack."""

"I'm so glad we could finally reconnect after all these years because I'd really like your help on my virtual farm."

"I read somewhere that only 2/11 jokes are funny. Well, what I read was that 9/11 jokes are never funny, but I like to be positive."

"Beards are a privilege, not a right"