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Joke of the Day

"Twitter. Where people you don't know are better friends than your real friends."

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"Where does a river keep it's money? At the bank."
"How are music and candy similar? We throw away the rappers."
"My boss noticed I shaved before coming in to the office today then he told me if i wanted to keep my job I would have to start keeping my pants on"
"What did Trump say to the women who told him she could give him the worlds best Blow Job. What's in it for me?"
"What do you call someone who commits piracy? Neckbeard the pirate"
"What do you get when you cross a Jehovah's Witness with a Hell's Angel? Someone that knocks on your door and tells YOU to fuck off."
"I'm fed up with the excuses women come up with to avoid having sex, like: "" I'm tired ."" ""I'm washing my hair."" ""I've got a headache."" ""I am your sister-in-law."""
"Confucius says: Woman who sleeps with judge..... receives honorable discharge"
"Virgins They never gave a fuck."