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Joke of the Day

"Mr Clause caught Mrs Clause cheating on him. What a ho ho ho."

"I renamed my iPod to Titanic... it's syncing now!"

"My jokes are like hot chicks Hard to get, and when you do they are not anywhere near as good as you thought they would be"

"Just so you know, people who don't give a fuck don't talk about how much they don't give a fuck all the fucking time."

"What's Mary short for? She's got no legs."

"What did the mama pig give her baby pig for its rash? ***OINKMENT!*** > (This exchange that I found on /r/tumblr makes this joke even funnier to me: > http://i.imgur.com/EzT0Bkd.jpg)"

"Parenthood teaches us that ""Blue's Clues"" and ""Booze Cruise"" sound alike for a reason."

"Hey dude, want some sodium hypobromite? NaBrO, I'm good."

"I make you wet and naked people turn me on. What am I? A shower"

"Take an icecube to the bar, smash it and say: ""Now that I've broken the ice, will you sleep with me?"""