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Joke of the Day

"What did the mama pig give her baby pig for its rash? ***OINKMENT!*** > (This exchange that I found on /r/tumblr makes this joke even funnier to me: > http://i.imgur.com/EzT0Bkd.jpg)"

"Why are spiders good swimmers ? They have webbed feet !"

"What if you woke up with amnesia and all you could remember was your Facebook password and you had to discover who you were based on your statuses?"

"Hey. Do these camo pants make me look fatigued?"

"The past, present, and future walk into a bar. It was tense."

"Please stop putting flyers on my windshield in parking lots. I have no desire to see your new band called ""Parking Violation""."

"I tried to write with my broken pencil today it was pointless"

"What do you get when you mix human DNA with zebra DNA? Kicked out of the zoo."

"I like woman who are mentally stable and sexually unstable."

"Whenever I see a bear on a motorbike I'm like, ""Good for you. You've not let the fact you can't be tattooed stop you from getting a bike."""