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Joke of the Day
"If fire shoots out of the chimney the Papal Conclave has selected a new drummer for Slayer."
Next Joke
"No time to exercise? Get the results of a 30 minute workout in only 3 seconds by accidentally stepping on your cat on the stairs in the dark"
"What was the General's answer... to the President's inquiry, as to what military division has been most under appreciated during his term? ""Tanks, Obama."""
"My girlfriend text me ""lets watch Godzilla""........ I reply ""look at the mirror""!"
"I always think the same thing when I find a Zubat and when I meet a stuck-up woman... I'm not wasting my balls on that!"
"Why is it so hard to explain puns to kleptomaniacs? Because they always take things literally."
"I havent talked to my wife in 6 months. I got a slap the last time I interupted her."
"DONALD Your tax returns now! Clinton: We all did our tax returns now show is yours Trump: I emailed it you"
"Facebook has become the girlfriend you no longer like but are scared to dump"
"I told my girlfriend I've known 3 whores in my life. The first one was named mercedes, the second one porsche, your name must be buick!"