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Joke of the Day

"In an alternate universe there is only one movie about falling in love, but thousands about swapping faces with John Travolta."

"It's weird how all the UFOs started disappearing once our cameras got better."

"Why do police officers sleep with two rocks near their bed? With one he turns off the light, With the other he checks if the window is closed"

"I have a Taiwanese friend who is is incredibly rude and bossy He has a strong Taipei personality"

"So archaeologists found another Dead Sea Scroll... They opened it up, and read: GENESIS 1:0 ""Before the beginning, there was Chuck Norris. And Chuck Norris said, 'Let there be God.'"""

"""You spent hours slaving away in the kitchen yesterday. Relax. Let me sort out dinner today."" *Orders pizza"

"I heard that Al Qaeda recently received substantial financial aid from an unknown person in South Korea. It seems the terrorists have Won."

"I'm a freshman taking geometry. I can't wait to learn how to tie a hypotenoose."

"What are the famous last words of a redneck? ""Hey ya'll, watch this!"""

"Why shouldn't you bowl against a snake? Because snakes make lots of strikes."