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Joke of the Day

"Any girl who says she's not the jealous type will change her tune when another girl phones you drunk at 3am."

"Wife: How many women have u slept with? Husband: Only you, Honey. With everyone else, I was awake."

"I'll never be able to clean my house faster than when someone texts saying they're coming over."

"Do you know why Jesus doesn't play hockey? Because he always get nailed into the boards."

"Shave legs ?? Bikini wax ?? Lose 10 lbs ?? Pluck eyebrows ?? Mani/pedi ?? Sexy panties ?? Ready for my big *date! *gynecologist"

"Who can shave 30 times a day and still have a beard? A barber."

"Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a supermarket trolley? A: The supermarket trolley has a mind of its own."

"welcome back to guitar 101 everybody. what now, steve? uh, hey. are you gonna make the 'snapped my g-string' joke? no *steve leaves*"

"Yoda is telling a joke to the Jedi Council... ""Why was six afraid of seven?"" he asks. Everyone remains silent, and he says: ""Because nine seven eight!"""

"What's the difference between a woman and a computer? A computer doesn't complain when you push a 3 1/2"" floppy into it."