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Joke of the Day

"[in a meeting] ok a Dracula movie except he's new in town and biting is illegal but he befriends the pastors daught- ""that's just Footloose"""

"If we make guns illegal, then nobody will get shot anymore. That's how we stopped everybody from doing drugs"

"The inventor of predictive text has died... His funfair will be hello on Sundial."

"Did you hear about the joke in /r/science? [+][deleted] 5 hours ago"

"Who called it ""the equals sign"" and not ""the aftermath""?"

"What's the most useful type of hat? A handy-cap"

"Why did the chicken cross the road? Who gives a flying fuck."

"People on Tumblr have PTSD Potty Trained and Socially Disordered"

"what would you call superman if he was deaf and mexican? No hero"

"[At historic site] Guide: Questions? Me: What's the wifi password? G: I meant about 19th century life. M: Oh....Dost thou have thy password?"