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Joke of the Day

"Wife left a note on the fridge it says ""It's not working, gone to my mom's"" I opened it and opened a beer, it's cold, the fridge works fine?"

Next Joke
 
"What words does Donald Trump find irresistibly sexy? ""You sick fuck, I'm calling the cops."""
"Welcome to Chili's here's your dirty fork, don't forget to spit on our hostess on the way out."
"I overclocked my computer processor this morning... The time advanced by one hour."
"Time to get ready for work Insomnia - OK. You can sleep now."
"I went to the store to buy condoms, the cashier asked me if I needed a bag. I told her ""No, she's not that ugly"""
"Pregnant coworker with 3 children who always complains about money: When are YOU going to start having kids? Me: When are you going to stop?"
"The backside of women is my second favorite part. It's right behind the front."
"A mushroom walks into a bar... Bartender says, ""We don't serve mushrooms here!"" So the mushroom says, ""Hey come on, I'm a fungi!"""
"A Neutron goes into a bar and orders a drink,when he asks how much the drink will cost him bartender says ""For you no charge""."