4314

Joke of the Day

"8 *walks into the house with covered in mud* Me: MY LORD 8: well that's a nice way to greet me but no, just your son."

"""I got you this for Valentine's Day."" [she opens the box and reveals several People magazines inside] ""I think we should see other people."""

"Why doesn't Mexico ever do well in the Olympics? Because every mexican that can run, jump, or swim is already in America."

"Where to dogs who lost their tails go? To a retail store."

"What do you call Kansas overrun by pirates? Arkansas"

"[first date] GIRL: When you said ""fitness freak"" in your profile, this isn't what I expected HALF-MAN/HALF-TREADMILL: It was an old photo"

"My girlfriend told me I was one in a million... When I looked through her text messages, I had to admit she was right"

"An orange juice factory decides to host a movie night.. They will be screening Pulp Fiction"

"My password is not working Put numbers in uppercase."

"What's the most dangerous part about Scrabble It's all fun and games until someone loses an I"