42847

Joke of the Day

"What's the longest word in the world? Smiles. Because there's a mile between each 'S'."

"When those Subway ""$5 Footlong"" commercials come on, every man is quietly calculating how much his penis is worth."

"Always be yourself... Unless you run into one of your exes... Then... Be a WAY more successful version of yourself..."

"Perfect example of good & Bad luck Wind blows a girls skirts high (Good luck) At the same time dust falls into the boys eyes (Bad luck)"

"Why did the little Dutch boy have to register as a sex offender? He kept on sticking his finger in a tyke."

"How many flies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two."

"What do princess diana and pink floyd have in common? Their last greatest hit was the wall."

"What do you call a dog in the middle of a muddy road ? A mutt in a rut !"

"I swapped my wife's parachute around with her backpack. Now when the bitch goes on her stupid camping holiday, all she will have is a parachute. *copypaste from sickipedia.org*"

"It's always an ungodly hour for atheists."