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Joke of the Day
"How many blondes does it take to screw a light bulb?? Just 1...blondes will screw anything."
Next Joke
"Don't do drugs Without me"
"I hate when people text me ""what are you doing?"" at 1:00 pm on a weekday. Well I don't have your Art History degree, so probably ""working""."
"A woman drives into a bar."
"Sorry, I'm in a hurry, lets talk while we walk... You go that way."
"What's green, fuzzy, has four legs, and if it falls out of a tree onto you it will probably kill you? A pool table. (*)"
"I wish the GPS lady would periodically say things like ""Doin' great"" or ""Still going the right way, good job."""
"I replace all the family pictures my coworkers have on their desks with pictures of baby sloths and suddenly I need professional help?!?"
"*Clark Kent takes his glasses off* Jimmy: ""OMG, it's Superman!"" *Clark puts his glasses back on* ""OMG, Clark! You just missed Superman!"""
"How do you fit 3 babies in a bowl? Blender. How do you get them out? Chips."