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Joke of the Day

"Never hire a guy with big muscles They move things around all day to look good, but don't actually do anything"

"What did the Jihadist say when he had explosive Diarrhea? ALLAHPOO AKBAR!"

"How not to be funny. /r/funny"

"I am part of the 1% Well, at least my cell phone battery is."

"I have no idea who invented ballet dancing but I'm willing to bet good money it was a guy trying to sneak back into bed after coming home pissed from a bar"

"Political joke Donald Trump"

"Two mods walk into a bar... [deleted]"

"My new washing machine plays a tune very similar to an ice cream truck when it's finished. There's no ice cream in there. I checked. Twice."

"I haven't been drinking. I know what day it is. I didn't lose my pants. This might be my car. I know how to drive. -Lies I've told to cops."

"I was thinking about quitting ciggaretes But my mom always taught me not to be a quitter"