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Joke of the Day

"The local radio station is having a contest. First place wins a week in New Jersey. Second place wins 2 weeks in New Jersey."

"There is a thin line between a numerator and denominator. Only a fraction of people will find this funny."

"What did the Navy battleship captain say to his first mate during a skirmish? [OC] I think I'm feeling C6"

"Why is it called cat nip and not meowjuana?"

"My history teacher is a communist, so I made lots of references to the Soviet Union in my essay. I got full marx."

"A sushi bar but it's just lots of different puppies you can pick up and pet going round on the conveyor belt."

"What is white and hurts a homophobic man if it lands on him? An airplane"

"Police were called to a daycare yesterday... Police were called to a daycare yesterday because a 5 year old was resisting a rest."

"Really? ""Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels?"" Um...may I introduce you to pizza?"

"I found where my mom hid the scissors, so everyone in my house woke up with a new haircut this morning."