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Joke of the Day

"How many social justice warriors does it take to change a lightbulb? Twelve, one to change it and the other eleven to start a support group called ""recovering from the darkness"""

"What did one ball say to the other? ""This guy in the middle is a dick"""

"Mommy what's an ""Act of God?"" Me: *Flashback to my CrossFit trainer* Well dear, an ""active god"" is in his mid-20s and has a smokin hot body"

"This sub has taken a dive recently I guess I should put my phone in rice to try and dry it out."

"Giving my liver a Rocky Balboa style pep talk"

"How do you keep a man in suspense?"

"What's the best way to remove a grass stain? Alcohol? I don't see how getting drunk will help, but whatever."

"My friend said I twist everything to my advantage. I took it as a compliment."

"Mother Teresa walks into a bar"

"Have you heard the one about the bed? No? That's 'cause it hasn't been made yet."