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Joke of the Day
"I am busy contemplating my future. Don't worry, this will only take a minute."
Next Joke
"Find someone who can make you happy, like a doctor or pharmacist....basically anyone who has access to mood-enhancing drugs."
"Stop Flaming Faggots! A Non profit dedicated to informing the public about the fire dangers of bundled sticks and stacked firewood."
"[pulling the casket a few inches away from the wall during a funeral] sorry just need to plug in my phone for a minute"
"Business idea: Own a profitable business"
"Curiosity killed the cat. NASA apologized profusely."
"a Freudian slip is when you say one thing but mean a mother"
"Our scariest president was probably Rushmore, because he had four heads"
"You see those cows over there? They are outstanding in their field."
"What's a pirate's favorite letter? AYEE ya thought it be ARRR but it be the 'C'!"