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Joke of the Day

"Two guys in CA walked off cliff playing Pokemon. Natural selection accelerated at 9.8 m/sec2."

"I hate when people ask me what I'll be doing with my life in 5 years... I mean, come on, it's not like I have 2020 vision."

"A psychic told me I was going to die a virgin So I raped her and asked for my 20$ back"

"Its ironic that the gay club was called ""pulse""... As 50 people didn't have one after the shooting"

"What do you do with a camel that won't move ...Camel tow it"

"Some people need therapy. ... The rest of us just know how to conceal evidence"

"Shout out to all the frozen desserts out there. Step to me with a dessert that ain't frozen and I'll snap your damn face off"

"What Would The Rocks Boyfriend Be Called? Fruity Pebble.."

"Gemini: You may find yourself wondering if you're dreaming or not. A simple test is to punch a cop in the face."

"I work at a bar, don't like it but it pays good. I just kneaded the Dough. EDIT: Not bar, bakery. Sand autocorrect. Never use Reddit on a phone."