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Joke of the Day
"How do you make a Vietnamese girl pregnant and rich at the same time? Give her the dong."
Next Joke
"What did the little girl's parents want for Christmas? A better son."
"When I want to trim down my friend's list on FB I give my opinion and let nature do the rest."
"WIFE: I love you NEIL DEGRASSE TYSON: Actually it's just emotional comfort after years of being toget- WIFE: *packing* I'll be at my mothers"
"[blood bank] Doc inserts needle [turns around] YOU AGAIN! [vampire sucking on tube like straw] GO ON SCOOT [chases him from room with broom]"
"What's the difference between jelly and jam? I can't jelly my dick in your mouth!"
"What shoes did the pedophile wear? White vans hah"
"I stab myself a little bit every day to slowly build up an immunity to being stabbed to death."
"DETECTIVE: TELL US WHERE THE STOLEN BANK MONEY IS HIDDEN ROBBER: Nope, but I WILL give you a series of clues DETECTIVE: ok this sounds fun"
"Knock Knock 'Who's there?' 'Europe.' 'Europe who?' 'No, you're a poo.'"