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Joke of the Day
"I eat a lot of grapes. I'm basically a wino with no patience."
Next Joke
"If you stop water with a dam... ...do you stop holy water with a goddamn? If you psychically stop holy water for a living, can you mind your own goddamn business? -&y (Yes i wrote that myself)"
"What would you name a prequel to a story about a man who doesn't age Personally I'm happy with 'The Picture of Ionian Gray'"
"She needs to slow her roll. Only been with my girlfriend for two months and she wants to meet my parents. She needs to chill, i waited nine months before meeting them myself."
"What do a gynecologist and a pizza delivery guy have in common? They can both smell it but they can't eat it."
"My safe word is ""insufficient funds""."
"I got sick from the Mexican ice cream shop... I got helladiarrhia."
"Just cleaned out my desk. Bad news: I apparently have 1,453 Sharpies and none of them are sharp. Good news: I found the plane!"
"Who is FAPMAN's greatest nemesis? The Stroker."
"I will not eat a donut. I will not eat a donut. I will not eat... I will not eat a third donut. I will not eat a third donut."