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Joke of the Day
"Son of Sam I Am, a serial killer who targets people who won't try new foods."
Next Joke
"5 jokes at once. Q: how to tell 5 jokes at once? A: One direction"
"I hope I never have to produce an alibi...cause eating salsa in bed with my cat every night would never hold up in court."
"[bday party] Mum: happy birthday son Me: wow that's a huge cake! Mum: its full of bees Me: what Mum [backing away]: I said it's cream cheese"
"Why did the gymnast's account get sent to collections? She had an outstanding balance."
"It's not the bullet that kills you, it's the hole."
"No matter how kind you are.... German kids are kinder."
"My corduroy pillow has been making headlines all week."
"Saitama tried to change his Facebook password to Goku but Facebook said it was too weak..."
"Sure I'll join your Cause on Facebook...Right after I jump out of an airplane without a parachute..."