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Joke of the Day

"What does a mathematician do about constipation? Sits down and works it out with a pencil."

"I hate being that creepy guy outside your window, but damn girl it's 7:30 already. You're gonna be late for work."

"This mothers day send the gift of Microsoft Office Word to your mother"

"a keyboard walks into a barbershop on the international space station ""i just want an easy, short cut"". then he hit the bar"

"Choose a job you love and you will never work a day in your life because that field isn't hiring."

"Uber driver just asked me ""how much would you pay to go swimming in the sky?"" I wish I hadn't seen how dilated his pupils were. Also, $975."

"Do you like this hotel? Then why don't you Marriott !!!! Hahahah"

"CNN reports Hurricane Patricia ""hit luxury resorts and impoverished villages with equal ferocity."" Did they expect wealth-based discernment?"

"Latey, my aphabet has been a the pace, I bame the fact there's ""noel"""

"Why are native South African Tribesman immune to lightning? 'cause you can't Shaka Zulu."