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Joke of the Day

"My mother picked up an Oreo but dropped it... My father looks and her and says, ""too bad you have butter fingers when you want an Oreo."""

Next Joke
 
"I'm going to keep buying cats until one of them does something hilarious and makes me a YouTube millionaire."
"I just came across a group of elderly fish... Old School."
"Things I haven't seen in a while: 1) the 2yo I'm babysitting today 2) a man 3) my waist-line 4) my imaginary goat, Bill 5) my sanity"
"The lack of paparazzi at this BBQ makes me think that my aunt can probably stop referring to her potato salad as ""famous."""
"Sodium...Sodium...Sodium...Sodium...Sodium... Batman!"
"Did you hear about the time Pontius Pilate got really drunk? He ended up nailing Jesus."
"What are you listening to? The Who Who? Yes You're listening to Yes? No The Who Oh I like them No not Them. The band is The Who. The Band?"
"For Halloween I put a empty bowl outside my door with a sign that says ""please take one"" That way it looks like I actually had candy once"
"I spilled laundry detergent on my rug! It really tide the room together."